OK, so by now, you may be familiar with one of my perfect flaws… Once I’ve made up my mind about something I want to do, I do it… Plenty of times I have measured my desire to do something because I really want to, against the desire to do something in spite of the person, place or thing that says I can’t, shouldn’t, or won’t. In such cases, I’m not quite sure where my desire is born, however I have to admit that something is always more alluring if I feel it is alluding. Maybe it’s just the law of nature, my survival instinct, or my own way of arguing with reality.
I will be the first to admit that although arguing with reality may be exciting, it may not always be beneficial… For example, the whole “Are these jeans too tight?” conversation that you have with yourself in front of the mirror, when you are painfully aware that even having the conversation with yourself means in fact they are… This is one argument that you do want to lose to reality, if only to breath, avoid impaling an innocent bystander with an explosive button, or to forego altering your midsection to resemble the top of a freshly made banana muffin from Starbucks. However, I enjoy ‘people watching’, and it appears that I am not the only one that has “won” an argument with reality that should have been lost… With that being said, I have a difficult time accepting no for an answer.
I have just passed the half way point of my stay here in Burbank, just steps away from Hollywood, and I have yet to make the pilgrimage to the coveted Hollywood sign on Mount Lee. Yesterday during class, I declared triumphantly that I was going to hike up to the Hollywood sign… A couple of my classmates decided this would be a great adventure, so we began to plan our trek through the mountainside to the infamous landmark. Quickly our plans became much more exciting, when we were told by a classmate (who lives locally) that the sign is fenced off, and there is no trespassing. As a group, we quickly pummeled reality to the ground, and without hesitation planned a detailed, exciting, and somewhat illegal nighttime ‘mission’ to the foot of the Hollywood sign. The plan, complete with code names, included scaling a fence, night vision goggles, a lookout with text messaging capabilities, really cute black outfits and avante guard makeup.
In the interest of anonymity, I will refer to my friends by their code names, Dark Night, Mambo Momma, and Jack. Mambo Momma came up with the idea of painting really cool black makeup masks on ourselves… we quickly got to work sketching or mask designs. Jack decided she would video us, using the infrared nighttime setting on her video camera. Dark Night frantically searched through fashion magazines to get ideas for our outfits, while inquiring with our instructors about flashlight headbands and infrared goggles. We all stayed after school for the optional 2 hour study hall, during which the talk of fines and possible arrest deterred some classmates from joining our expedition.
Later that evening, I spent hours researching the best hiking routes and security measures surrounding the sign. Much to my dismay, I discovered an airtight security system including 9 infrared cameras on and around the sign, as well as several on the trail head that are heavily monitored by park rangers and live Internet feed. Keeping within the scope of Epic Hollywood proportions, there are also patrol helicopters triggered by motion detectors. All of a sudden perfecting the symmetry of my blush application looked more promising than a photo op at the giant letter H. Not wanting to lose to reality, I studied the position of the cameras for at least 30 more minutes…
Thirty minutes later, reality had me in a choke hold, and I reluctantly declared defeat. Today at school I broke the news to my squad. Reality did not win without a fight… We threw around several complicated, and in some cases, dangerous alternatives. The ideas included, but were not limited to a friend of a friend who owns a helicopter service, a diversion technique involving Midnight Mambo and a park ranger, 12 dozen helium balloons, and a larger diversion technique requiring a minimum of 12 people, just to name a few…
So it looks like this weekend the mission impossible squad will be taking photos of the Hollywood sign via the near by observatory and practicing our blush strokes…
Copy that. This is Dark Night to tower signing out.
